Battle of the Semes
by BlackRoseThorne
Summary: Riku and seme!Roxas argue while Sora and uke!Axel look on. Ukes have such grace. Ummm...blood and violence involved...insinuations about the size of Roxas' anatomy. Aerith breaks things.


**AN: **Okey pokey. So it's been a long ass time since I've posted anything. And this is one of the dumbest things I've ever written. But I have an excuse. I got a _veeerrrryy_ basic idea for a story a couple of months ago and then at Thanksgiving I had to entertain myself on the way to the Hell. Snick, you know what I'm talking about. I'm sorry it's not very long and has very little substance, but it's 11:30 pm and I have Chemistry and AP Euro finals to look forward to tomorrow and felt the undeniable need to post something.

**Warnings: **Swearing, blood, violence, implied sex, scorned!Roxas, angry!Sora, and uke!Axel--wait, WHAT?!

**Disclaimer: **All your Squeenix are not belonging to us.

**Battle of the Semes**

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"Bull-fucking-shit, you bastard!"

"Roxas, aren't you a little _young _to be using words like that?"

"Shut up, you jackoff, I'm eighteen years old!"

"Really, cuz you look more like you're twelve."

"At least I don't have hair like a _girl!" _Riku growled in the back of his throat.

"Big words for someone so _small."_

"Was that a shot at my height? I AM NOT THAT SHORT!"

"Oh don't worry I didn't mean small like _that_."

"AAARGGH!" Roxas took a flying leap and tackled Riku to the ground.

Sora watched from where he was reclined on a pile of pillows as his boyfriend and his brother tried to rip each other apart. He chuckled lightly. He should probably have been worried, but he wasn't. Riku was strong and Roxas fought dirty, so they were pretty evenly matched.

Sora looked away from the scuffle when he felt the pillows shift next to him. Axel was currently folding himself onto the plush pile with an unconcerned gaze trained on the two males trying to kill each other. He had a grape soda in each hand and handed one to Sora, who nodded his thanks and took a small sip. Axel leaned back on a particularly fluffy cushion and looked up at Sora who was situated higher up on the pile than he.

"So what are they fighting about?"

"Which of them can produce louder reactions in bed."

"I see."

"Which is silly."

"Yes, yes it its."

"So…who is it?" Axel looked up at Sora with a furrowed brow. He scratched his chin contemplatively.

"Probably Riku, cuz I'm not that loud and when I am I bite down on something…usually Roxas," he added with an amused smile. "Besides, you look like a screamer."

Sora had the decency to blush cutely before saying, "Yeah, I am."

"I bet Riku _loves _that."

"He does." Axel let his gaze travel back to the pair wrestling on the floor. Riku had Roxas pinned to the ground, but the blonde brought his knee into the older's stomach.

"So, who do you think will win?" Axel asked .

"Well, considering that Riku made insinuations about the size of Roxas' dick…"

"Roxas. Definitely," Axel said with finality.

"Yep." Sora's chocolate locks bounced as he nodded.

"We should have been expecting this, it's been a while since they last fought."

"I know…I think Riku realized that and decided to pick a fight."

"So Riku started this one? That's cool, Roxas started the last three."

"**Jesus Christ**!" The two resting men looked up to see Roxas with a knee to Riku's groin…and _not _in a good way. Roxas himself had blood pouring from his nose and he seemed to be reveling in the fact that he was staining Riku's pants.

Sora and Axel shared a knowing look and a nod. It was time to put an end to this. They lifted themselves gracefully from the cushions and strolled over to the battle arena. Axel placed a strong hand on the bombastic blonde's shoulder.

"Roxas, off," he said with finality. Roxas glared up at him over his shoulder but got up and stepped back. Sora knelt next to Riku murmuring comforting words and pushing his silver hair out of his face, which was still contorted in pain. Sora looked reproachfully up at his twin.

"Roxas, was that really necessary? I don't care much if you guys fight, but if this affects my nights at all, I will **not**be happy." And happy is something the world wants Sora to be, because when he's not happy, no one is.

"Fucker deserves it. He kicked me in the kidney-I'm gonna be pissing blood for a week. I hope-" Roxas was unable to finish his sentence as Axel took the blonde's face in his large hands and turned it this way and that, inspecting the cuts and bruises. Riku sat up and pressed his head into Sora's small chest while the brunette ran fingers through his hair. Soon, however, the sound of glass shattering alerted the boys to a new presence. Aerith looked horrified as she stared at the bruised and battered boys and her blood-stained floors.

"Dear God, what happened in here?!" Leon and Cloud stepped around her to look at the carnage. Leon smirked.

"Battle of the Semes." Aerith looked confused and appalled.

"But _why_?"

Cloud nodded sagely.

"The only reason for a battle of the Semes is the congratulatory and consolation sex that will inevitably follow." Leon's smirk widened in agreement.

"Well, that's just _silly_," Aerith said, picking up the remnants of the glass she had been carrying and gliding out of the room.

Leon walked over and helped haul Riku to his feet and held him up when his knees buckled slightly.

"Yes it is silly," Axel mused as he massaged a kink out of Roxas' neck. "Come on, Rox…congratulations are in order." As he was leading Roxas to their bedroom he glanced back at Sora just as he was pulling back from a kiss. He smiled and suddenly wondered if he _could _outscream Sora. 'Well,' he thought, 'won't know until I try.'

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**AN: **I'm sorry if it sucks. I'm even more sorry if you grow tired of my negativity, but I'm sleepy. Reviews are love, let me know if it was worth reading at all. It would be so awesome to come home to reviews after finals. Snickles...pity me because you love me. 


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